Only In Story Books

My Top Ten of Why's

2005-03-13T14:22:00.000-04:00

Working in the medical field can be rewarding, one would think but, people can drive you crazy just like any other job. This is a list of some things that make me want to pull my hair out. I have narrowed it down to only ten things.

My Top Ten List of Why's

1. Why don't they listen to me? A breathing test that I have to do with patients requires the individual to inhale deeply. For some reason, the patient is always exhaling, not inhaling. This ends up in me saying repeatedly and loudly to patients Suck, don't Blow!

2. Why, why why, don't women pick up their giant breasts for me while I am putting the cardiac monitoring leads on their chest? I know it is only putting stickers on someone's chest but it becomes a difficult task when I have to lean over the bed, breaking my back so I can hold up breasts that are sometimes larger than my head.

3. Why do patients in a hospital think that they are guests at the Four Seasons? I seriously think that some people come to the hospital so that they can be waited on. Can you pick that up for me? Can you cover me up? Can you fix my pillows? Can you get me something to eat? Can you turn on the TV for me?

4. Why are they on the phone all of the time? There are patients that are only there to talk on the phone. When any hospital staff member comes in there room for any type of service the patient cannot be disturbed because they are "on the phone". And it is usually a response that goes something like this, "Can't you see I am on the phone? You are going to have to come back!"
"Oh, gee, I'm sorry, you are in a hospital. You know, to receive treatment so that you can get better," this is said in my sweetest most endearing voice. I promise.

5. Why do patients have no shame. They act as if they are on a nude beach. They think it is okay to walk around with their bare asses shown and balls flappin in the wind. Put some damn clothes on people.

6. Why do visitors bring in babies to see sick people? I don't get this. A hospital is dirty and contains germs that you don't know how to pronounce. A poor little baby who's immune system is so fragile. Poor baby, I am sorry your mommy is an idiot.

7. Why do they let patients in the cafeteria? I am trying to eat for God sakes. It is bad enough that I have to expose myself to germs that I have to get tested for every three months but at least I am given a chance to don my preventative gear(gloves, mask, gown, sometimes eyewear), but in the cafeteria I am not prepared to deal with the germs.

8. Why do they let patients go outside to smoke? Of course those are the patients that are admitted for pneumonia, asthma, and lung cancer.

9. Why do they not comprehend? When I say please lift your head up off the pillow. Why do they lift their chin up in the air with their head still lying on the pillow? It it not the same thing!
This leads me to my next one

10. What is with the shoulder shrug? When I say to a patient take a deep breath, why do they lift their shoulders up and down? No, no, your chest should be rising and falling.

As you can see, I have been working too many hours and I am exhausted. All of these things frustrate me more than anything else but, sometimes I just laugh to myself as I am yelling at the hard of hearing patient "Suck Don't Blow" over and over.

A Toddler Playing With a Sex Toy = Wrong!

2005-02-11T00:31:00.000-04:00

I found an IKEA Sex Toy commercial. Go to this website to see it. http://guide.real.com/?DC=RN30AV3 Then go to the lower left and click on IKEA Sex Toy Ad.
This needs to be seen!

I Had to do it Again

2005-02-10T07:59:00.000-04:00

I had to look! I had to look! Now, I am sick. I want to vomit. It is back all over again. I can't stand not to snoop. It is in my genes for God sakes. Did I really think I could stop? Now, I sound like a fuckin drug addict. The not knowing made me insane. I had to and now I am paying for it. Now, all I will be able to do is think about it. All day at school. All day at work tomorrow. I probably won't be able to sleep. The funny thing is that it was the dream I just woke up to that made me snoop once again. My dream was that it was my husband's b-day party and there was a ton of people there. All these girls kept showing up that I didn't know and they all would wish him a happy birthday and kiss him right on the lips. And of course, he said that they were all just friends. I did not know one of them nor, did he introduce me to any of them. His own wife not knowing any of his "friends", but "friends" that kiss on the lips of a married man? AHHHHHHHHH!

The real life story is that my husband has his cell phone attached to him at all times. Seriously, at all times. He sometimes falls asleep with it in his pj pants' pockets. No one calls our house phone to get a hold of him. Sometimes when we are together and his phone rings he will not answer it. When I would ask who was calling he would just say some name that I had never heard of before. Apparently, a "friend" that I had never met. And he will never keep his phone out in the open. If it would be out in the open I might just see who is calling.

Well, this all added up and it started making me suspicious, which I think any normal person would be. Wouldn't you? Well, I started snooping which only led to arguments and heartache. The more I snoop, it seems the worse it gets. Now, he has even put a code on his phone so that when he is sleeping at nite I can't get into it. Snooping while he was sleeping started to be a ritual. I wouldn't sleep at nite just so that I could wait until he was really sleeping. Then I would never go back to sleep because what I had found would have me sick. The only thing I can do now is look to his online cell phone number account and see who he calls and who calls him and it also shows the text messages too. The problem with all of this is I don't know what anyone is saying I can only assume. The biggest problem is that I can't say anything because he would know that I am snooping. But really who is in the wrong here, him for lying to me or, me for snooping?

Oh, how did I get into this mess? What were they talking about? Why did he call her so many times and never once called me? Can it ever be fixed? What did they text message to each other? Can I ever trust him?
Where is my Guardian Angel?

Are you a "Babbling Brook" or a "Dead Sea"?

2005-02-08T18:47:00.000-04:00

I have mentioned that my husband and I are off to a shakey marriage of only seven months. We completely love each other but there is so much more that we really need to work on. His problem is that he has difficulty talking to me. And you might say how did you marry someone like that? Especially, since we have been together for seven years before we got married. Well, I am not sure of the correct answer. Maybe, I didn't find out until now, when many things that should be talked about in a marriage are not. A co-worker bought me a book as a wedding gift called The Five Love Languages, How To Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate by Gary Chapman. I started reading it a few weeks ago and boy does it help me see some light. I am not done reading it just yet, but what I have read so far is damn good. Since the husband and I are realizing out loud that we have a problem, I start to tell him about one of the chapters I read in my favorite new book.

It went something like this.... There are two personality types. One is "the Dead Sea". The Dead sea receives but does not give. It goes nowhere. This personality type receives many experiences, feelings, and thoughts and stores the information instead of talking about it. The second personality, "the Babbling Brook", is the complete opposite. Whatever comes in through the mouth gate, ear gate, or eye gate flows right out the mouth. They must talk about every emotion they are feeling . They may even be talking out loud and no one is around. The book explains that many times A "Dead Sea" marries a "babbling Brook" because it is a very attracting match. The "Babbling Brook" gets all of their words in while the Dead Sea" is content just listening. So, I explain this to my husband and responds with "How do you change a "Dead Sea or a Babbling Brook" and why would you want to if that is the person you fell in love with?" Of course, I had the answer that was given in the book but was it really true what he was saying? Well, the answer that the book gave was to talk about three things that happened through out the day to each of you and talk about how it made you feel. Therefore, the "Babbling Brook" can learn to listen and the "Dead Sea" can learn to share.

I don't know if this book is feeding me a bunch of BS but it sounds good. So, if anyone has any advice for me let me know. And of course, I am the "Babbling Brook".

The Fortunate

2005-02-05T22:42:00.000-04:00

I work in the medical field and people's lives are in my hands every day. Many of my patients die but I am not bothered by it. At other times, some people tug on your heart strings. Today, I disconnected someone from life support. This is not abnormal for me. It is part of my job and I probably do it at least once a day while I am at work. For the most part, it is best for the patient and is therefore, a blessing. Today, it was the same circumstances. This person was very sick and it was a blessing to let him go in peace and not have to struggle for every breath. At his bedside, sat his wife. I would usually just do my job and walk out of the room but, today this woman needed me. She needed to talk to someone. She needed to tell me everything that had been going on in her tragic life. I listened to her and kept her company while her husband drifted off to an eternal sleep. This woman explained to me that she just lost her son, her daughter was just diagnosed with cancer, and is now dealing with the death of her soulmate, her husband.

I just want everyone to think about what this woman went through today and what she will face in the near future. Loneliness, sadness, fear, grief and so much more.

So, when you are feeling sorry for yourself, please, don't. There are so many people who deserve to. We, the fortunate, need to be strong for the weak.

Days like today help me realize why I am in the medical field. And most importantly, that I am the fortunate.

Does it Lose its Flavor?

2005-02-03T19:39:00.000-04:00

Has anyone ever noticed that pop never tastes the same after it has been opened? I am not talking about the pop going flat days after it has been opened. I am talking about a couple hours after it has been opened or even ten minutes later. To me, it seems that the flavor starts to evaporate after it has been opened. It never tastes as good as the first few sips from the can or bottle. Recently, someone told me that they shake their pop up and it tastes better that way. She told me to just shake enough to mix it all up. I had never heard of anyone doing this before and I thought it was odd, but then again, my thought may be even stranger.

Oh, and I never drink the last few sips from a bottle or can. That always tastes the worst. If anyone else experiences this please let me know.

For all of you Non-Michiganders: Pop=Sodapop
I don't know how it came about but, we call it pop.

Curing the Blues

2005-02-01T20:50:00.000-04:00

I can't believe how much planning a trip can help a person feel better. When people have serious illnesses they say that if you give the person something to look forward to they will live longer. It gives them a purpose for living. Maybe this theory should not only be used for the sick. The healthy living need something to look forward to as well. I think this is why I obsess over whatever is going to be the next event in my life. I always need something to look forward to whether it is school, work, wedding, a new house, etc.. I completely obsess over one thing until it is over and then I need something else to keep my mind busy. The negative part of this is that I should always be concentrating on something else. Therefore, I am always procrastinating. Well, planning a trip is the new obsession at the moment and it is making me feel much better. It is helping me cure the "Winter Blues". At least for now.

The Winter Blues

2005-01-31T23:51:00.000-04:00

I always get the "Winter Blues" about this time every year. Everything looks gray outside and it gets me very depressed. I used to always try to take a trip in the month of March. This did two things for me. One, it gave me something to look forward to in the winter. Secondly, if I saw and felt the hot sun for a week or so it would remind me that it would soon come to the frigid state of Michigan. It was like the the sunrays would penetrate into my skin and rejuvenate me for a couple more months until it soon again got warm in Michigan. Therefore, it would help cure my "Winter Blues". I love the hot sun and these terribly cold months are hard for me to get through. Most of all, I hate it when the sun is shining and it is about seventeen degrees fahrenheit. The sun is so deceiving. I would rather it not shine at all. I talked to a friend today on the phone and she said to me "Oh, wasn't it a beautiful weekend?" And she continued to go on about the sun shining so beautifully. I said "No. It was fuckin cold." How can anyone think that anything under seventy degrees is beautiful? It is puzzling to me.

Today, I do not have a pit in my stomach. Things with the husband have been good the past couple of days. I really hope that they continue to go that way. He told me today that he has the "Winter Blues". So, I was then trying to correlate our rough times in our relationship to the seasons. I concluded that we both hate the winter and we tend to argue a lot more in the winter. In the summer, we always seem to be so much more happier and much more in love. So, now I have one more reason to hate the winter and have the "Winter Blues".

P.S. I hope my Guardian Angel is still watching over us.

The Realization Day

2005-01-29T22:50:00.000-04:00

Today he finally realized that we have a serious problem or, maybe he knew but never wanted to admit to it. Maybe me screaming at the top of my lungs at him in front of one of his friends helped him see that I can not take this anymore. He told me that he asked someone for advice today that has been married for thirty-eight years. Ofcourse, the advicee said that communication is the key. This is what I have been trying to tell him all along. Well, he said that he will make a conscious effort to communicate with me. Those were his exact words. I hope that he really does try.

Maybe my Guardian Angel is helping me. And Angel if you are? Thank you.

Are You Out There?

2005-01-28T22:58:00.000-04:00

How can you love someone so much but at the same time hate them? I just don't understand. I have always heard that there is a thin line between love and hate. I thought that it was just a saying but, I am finding out that it's true. The problem is I don't think that it is something you should be saying about your husband.
I wish I had a Guardian Angel that could come and tell me how to work through all of this. I wish I had all of the answers. Angel, are you out there?

Well, I had good intentions.

2005-01-27T21:36:00.000-04:00

When I woke up this morning I was determined to have a good day. It started with an aerobic workout. I feel that I need to "get into shape". I have found that I can not walk up hill a short distance without getting short of breath. Since I am only in my twenties, I have decided that this is definitely a problem. My gym membership expired the beginning of this month. Not that I have even been there since before my wedding, which was in June. So, instead of paying out more money I decided to TiVO Denise Austin's morning workouts. Go ahead and laugh. Just keep in mind that I am trying to save money. I have every type of exercise doodad that has been advertised on every infomercial. I have also tried the women's only gyms, the coed gyms and I even have a Total Gym in my house. Get the point. Anyway, I even made it to class on time so, the first half of my day went well. The good day ended when I spoke to the husband. Let me briefly explain. My husband does not have the best track record. We have only been married seven months and he is a compulsive liar. Every time I catch him in a lie it ruins my day and gives me a terrible pit in my stomach that makes me want to vomit. Well, today he lied to me again. When I arrived at home we didn't make eye contact, or say one word to each other. The pit in my stomach is back! All I can say is that I had good intentions today.